“If I have told you earthly things and you do not believe, how can you believe if I tell you heavenly things?” – John 3:12 (ESV)
I came to Him at night.
Not just because of fear, though yes, there was that—
Fear of my colleagues’ judgment,
Fear of what it might cost me.
But also because night is for serious conversations,
For questions that burn in your soul,
For thoughts too weighty for daylight hours,
For admissions you can barely whisper to yourself.
“You must be born again,” He told me.
Born again? How can this be?
Can a man enter his mother’s womb a second time?
What riddle was this teacher speaking?
His words still echo in my mind:
“If I have told you earthly things and you do not believe,
How can you believe if I tell you heavenly things?”
The question exposed my heart—
I had come seeking knowledge, not transformation.
I wanted to understand Him, not follow Him.
I sought information, not rebirth.
I left with more questions than answers,
Yet something had taken root within me,
A seed planted in the darkness
That would slowly grow toward the light.
And then came that terrible day,
The sky darkening at midday,
The earth shaking beneath our feet,
The temple veil torn from top to bottom.
As we wrapped His broken body in linen,
I remembered His words about being lifted up,
About new birth, about heavenly things,
And I understood at last what He had been telling me.
New birth isn’t about knowledge,
But surrender.
Not about comprehending mysteries,
But becoming a mystery yourself—
A person being remade by the Spirit.
Perhaps you, like me, come to Jesus in the darkness,
With questions you dare not ask in daylight,
With doubts that trouble your sleep,
With a hunger for something more.
Don’t let your knowledge become a barrier to belief.
Don’t let your questions prevent your surrender.
Don’t wait until it’s too late to publicly stand with Him.
For the wind of the Spirit still blows where it wishes,
Still offers new birth to those willing to receive it,
Still transforms those who come with honest questions,
Even those who come by night.
Will you, like me, move from curious questioner
To committed follower?
From nighttime seeker
To daylight proclaimer?
The journey begins with admitting
That you must be born again.