FIRST – I finished the draft of Discovery. Finished. The whole draft. Now it’s really fat. I tend to overwrite, to write everything just in case I need it later. That means the draft meanders and has a LOT more than it needs. It has characters and scenes that may or may not make the cut. So the project over the next few months (after my Old Testament class finishes) will be to trim it down so that it doesn’t drag and keeps you turning pages. It would be awesome if we could get this out next summer…
The cool thing is that now we have AI, and I confess I have had too much fun creating images. (So, Much. Fun.) For example, here’s young Brad Molinsky., our hero…
SECOND – I wanted to make sure you knew about the release of Contingency: Between the Lines. Here’s a sample so you can see what it’s like. Here are points 6 and 7 from Chapter 1 and a journal entry for Bobbi.
6. Seeking God in Crisis
Reflection: In her moment of crisis, Bobbi cries out to God with questions: “How could he? How could You let him? How are we supposed to recover from this?”
“Deep calls to deep at the roar of your waterfalls; all your breakers and your waves have gone over me. By day the LORD commands his steadfast love, and at night his song is with me, a prayer to the God of my life.” Psalm 42:7-8
Question: How does God meet us in our moments of deepest pain and questioning? What does it mean to be honest with God about our feelings?
Application: Write a prayer expressing your honest feelings to God about a difficult situation you’re facing or have faced. Include your questions, doubts, and hopes.
7. The Path Forward
Reflection: As the chapter closes, Bobbi resolves to be “ready for him when he came home,” suggesting a determination to face the situation head-on rather than remain passive.
“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.” James 1:5
Question: What wisdom do we need when facing betrayal or other relational crises? How can we discern the right path forward?
Application: What situation in your life requires God’s wisdom right now? How might you actively seek His guidance rather than remaining passive?
Bobbi’s Journal
July 28
I can barely hold the pen. My hand won’t stop shaking. How is it possible that yesterday morning I woke up thinking I knew my life, and today I wake up a stranger to it?
That email. Those words. “My whole evening is free again. *wink*” I keep seeing them when I close my eyes. I didn’t even mean to read it—just a glance at Chuck’s computer while looking for that file he mentioned. Now I can’t un-see it. Can’t un-know what I know.
Chuck isn’t home. He’s still in Kansas City. Or is he? Is he even where he said he’d be? How many other lies have there been? Seventeen years of marriage, and suddenly I’m questioning everything. Every late night at the office. Every business trip. Every time he was distant or distracted. Were those all lies too?
I tried calling him. Six times. Straight to voicemail. I left messages that started calm and ended . . . not calm. I called his office. Tracy doesn’t work there anymore. Convenient. I called the hotel. He checked out early. Of course he did.
The boys . . . What do I tell them? How do I look at their faces—Chuck’s eyes in Joel’s face, Chuck’s smile on Brad’s lips—and explain that their father . . . No. I can’t even write it down. As if not writing it makes it less real.
I keep moving through the house like a ghost. Making coffee I can’t drink. Straightening things that don’t matter. If only I could wash away the knowledge. But it’s there, lodged like a stone in my chest.
I’ve always been the strong one. The organized one. The one who holds everything together. But I don’t know how to hold this. It’s too big, too heavy. I feel like I’m drowning in my own kitchen.
God, where are You in this? How could You let this happen? We’ve served You, built our marriage on You. I’ve tried so hard to be a good wife, a good mother, a good Christian. Was it all for nothing? How are we supposed to recover from this?
I keep thinking about that stupid BMW. The one he had to have. The one that was going to make him look successful to his clients. Was it for her? Did she ride in it? Did they . . .
I can’t go there. I’ll shatter if I go there.
I need to pull myself together. I need to be ready for him when he comes home. I need answers. I need the truth, all of it, no matter how much it hurts.
But what if the truth is that he doesn’t love me anymore? What if he wants her instead?
No. I can’t think like that. One step at a time. Get through today. Face him when he gets home. Then decide what comes next.
God, if You’re there, if You’re listening, I need You now more than I’ve ever needed You before. Because I don’t know how to do this. I don’t know how to be this person—the betrayed wife, the broken woman. I don’t know how to face today, let alone tomorrow.
Help me.
THIRD, I’d love to hear your questions. Reply to the email and I’ll do my best to address them in a future post.
Thank you so much for reading!